The Fake Detour goes a little something like this. I’m traveling down the sidewalk at a normal speed (maybe fast walking) when I begin to close in on a pedestrian in front of me. I slow down enough to maintain a comfortable distance, usually about 5 to 10 feet behind the person in front of me. The pedestrian in question then commences The Fake Detour by straying from the sidewalk and stopping, as if to observe a sign or something on the ground or as if to stop to think. Once I pass by the person, he or she will continue back on the sidewalk, now safely behind me.

I hypothesize that the subject (1) is aware that I can travel at a faster speed than him or her, (2) perceives that I desire to travel at a speed faster than him or her, and (3) is compelled by feelings of empathy and or insecurity to remove him or herself temporarily from the sidewalk, leaving my path unimpeded.

I further hypothesize that the majority of subjects commit The Fake Detour out of feelings of insecurity rather than those of empathy. It is as if they think I am a stalker on wheels, determined to catch them in a secluded area where I will undoubtedly inflict irreparable damages to their toes and shins. To date, I have only defended myself from this deceptive maneuver by increasing the distance between me and the pedestrian in front of me. But my defense is no longer enough. I am now considering a counteroffensive measure. It’s simple. I will counter The Fake Detour with The Fake Detour, engaging unsuspecting pedestrians in psychological warfare.

To those who will say, “But what about the ones who move out of empathy for you?”, this is my reply. There will be some unavoidable casualties.

Freedom isn’t free.

Today’s carnival is special to me because it is the first one I have ever hosted. Since beginning this blog in June, I have learned much from the disability blogosphere: one, that it existed; two, that there is a lot of people who are like me and can relate to my experiences. And yes, that was a list—the theme of this week’s carnival. I chose “Lists” as the theme because they are so flexible. You really can have a list about anything! In fact, I even made a list of links that are featured in this edition of the DBC. It is available at:

delicious.com/royblakewatson/dbc-49/.

Let’s start this thing off with an oldie. I’m not talking about Stephen Deal, but rather his humorous “You’re Not Taking Your Disability Seriously If…” list. And while we’re being funny, we might as well have a look at Astrid’s “Cynical List of Things I Learned in a Year in the Psychiatric Hospital.” “If life sucks for you, don’t say it out loud, because it can always suck more,” she warns.

And sometimes, it’s other people making life more difficult. Andrea is sick of all the crap excuses that lifeless, bureaucratic pawns can come up with to suppress self-advocating disabled people and their requests of fairness. Unfortunately, these self-advocates are sterotyped as whiners. And speaking of stereotypes, here’s some “Autism Ain’ts” from Joel at NTs Are Weird, and a protest against a book from aspierhetor.com.

Of similar topic, Ettina from Abnormaldiversity shares with us a list of “major components of how the ‘experts’ create panic and sell their therapies.” It seems they use scare tactics and “rosy promises” (like politicians?) to compel parents to agree to their various treatments.

Laura from Touched By an Alien provides a list of what she thinks are “The essential components” for individuals with Asperger Syndrome. Frida writes a list of clues for able people.

Shiva from Biodiverse Resistance begins a series calles Neurodiversity in Literature that focuses “on characters in novels who are really obviously (what would now be recognised as) autistic or otherwise neurodiverse.” The first looks at Noah Joad from “The Grapes of Wrath.”

Several bloggers have given us lists of tips. Greg from Pitt Rehab gives us a list of useful Web sites. Kara offers a list of charitable causes worth your donations. Dean gives us some tips about helping back pain. And Grace from Disabled 2 Abled has some great tips for “Computer Comfort,” which are relevant to us bloggers.

Rickismom from Beneath the Wings writes about all the lists connected to her daughter, Ricki. She admits that some of her lists—like the “list of skills needed to learn to reach independence”—may be a little “tyrannical.” Erin from School Psychologist Blog Files writes about “The Benefits of an Inclusion Classroom.”

Emma gives us a list of things she intended to do and things she did instead. She also has a cool 101 in 1001 to-do list. And Suzanne from disabilitiyjourney.com writes about the satisfaction of checking off items from a to-do list.

And now you can check off that you’ve read through the 49th Disability Blog Carnival. Thank you for visiting. And thanks to all those who submitted entries. We couldn’t do it without us!

Cheers.

EDIT: Here’s a list (why not?) of submissions I missed.

• Cheryl lists the reasons she why she hasn’t been blogging as much. I would say that number 3, concentration, is a big one for me.

It is frustrating because I must always be in a position of balance to perform tasks (e.g., eating) independently. I have an unnofficial list of positions that I use. Eating fingerfoods requires a position I call “The Praying Mantis.” I stand my arms on the table with my hands propped against each other. It resembles a praying position. I have another position for eating more complicated foods that require a spoon or a fork. I have another for using my computer, playing video games, sleeping, using the restroom, driving my chair, riding in my van, and a host of other situations.

Now I know it’s probably picky to expect someone to have every position memorized, but I think some people I have worked with lacked an understanding of simple physics. The same people usually have trouble following short, specific commands (e.g., slide both elbows toward each other). Some parts of my body are “dead weight,” if you will. So if I’m wanting to stand my arms up in The Praying Mantis position, but my assistant doesn’t prop my arms against each other, they will fall. It takes the weight of each arm pushing against each other to hold them up.

Some of my balancing acts (e.g., eating chips with a fork) are so unusual that one of my friends has dubbed me the MacGyver of eating. I must admit, I’m proud of my enginuity. Sometimes, I wish I could spend a week in an occupational therapist’s office with someone who thinks like me. I might be able to figure out how to play the piano. I’ve written some music, but I haven’t been able to hear it played on a real piano.

To my attendants’ defense, most of them have been good. I know it must be difficult for someone with full use of their muscles to think the way I do. In that context, I suppose I have had some great attendants. But when someone can’t seem to use his or her common sense when helping me, it rubs me the wrong way.

Self-centered? Maybe. Wrong? I don’t think so.

Leave a comment on this post and include the URL to your submission, or better yet, use the official article submission page.

Here are some links of note. The first is the Disability Blog Carnival page, which provides the schedule, themes, hosts, etc. The second is the current blog carnival, which is being hosted at Day in Washington.

More info on the Nov. 13 carnival the date nears. Stay tuned.

EDIT: The frequency of the Disability Blog Carnival is every second and fourth Thursday, not Monday as I said in the video. I think the blog carnival page has a typo on it. I read it wrong.

Matt and I were allowed to enter the auditorium early to find a place to park our chairs before the crowd congested the aisles. Ironically (maybe), the place chosen for the screening was one of the more inaccessible buildings on campus. It remains that way largely because of its historical value. It’s an old building, but its classic. However, the auditorium was recently renovated extensively. Ramps had even been constructed to allow wheelchairs onto the stage. Unfortunately, the planners of the renovation failed to include sufficient wheelchair seating in the auditorium. The organizers of the screening made up for it (or tried to) by reserving the entire front row, allowing wheelchairs to park in front of the seats. Not wanting to stick out, Matt and I parked to the far right of the front row.

I had high hopes for the film, but I was a bit skeptical as well. I was unsure how the film would present life with a disability (in this case, one similar to mine). I was unsure how my non-disabled peers would react. Would it give them a better understanding of how one lives with a disability? Would it confirm that people with disabilities have no hope and should just play and be taken care of until they die? Would it invoke empathy or sympathy? Would it make them think of people with disabilities as slightly inferior (in an unconscious way)?

The storyline was definitely the stuff of a documentary film. An ordinary kid. A bold quest. I couldn’t help but think that it would be entertaining, while also showing how ordinary people with disabilities live life.

And so we watched as Darius and his good friends set out for California. They had ups and downs along the way, but they always made the best of the downs. The often used humor to turn a crappy situation into a funny one. I won’t ruin it for you, since you’re going to buy the film on DVD, but it was a success.

While it was somewhat touching and emotionally dramatic, which I think is what many expected, it also realistically showed some the issues people with MD face. It emphasized empathy. It emphasized the need for accessibility. Yeah, it was probably not presented the way I, my brother, or other person with a disability would have presented it, but Darius’ crew presented it well from the perspective of the non-disabled person. They did so with understanding. Audiences probably relate to the film more from this perspective.

Best of all, they helped show something that I, for one, find difficult to express at times. Personality. We got to know Darius. His jokes. His smack talk. His laugh. His attitude. His talents. His passions. The things that make Darius, well, Darius. I’ve felt, at times, that having a disability made social interactions trickier and more awkward than if I had not had a disability. Sometimes it takes people a while to get to know me because of that barrier. Some people click with me easily, some don’t. I suppose that’s what it’s like with everyone. But of everything in the film, the revelation of Darius’ personality best provides understanding about people with disabilities. That they are just that. People.

DGW—Know about it.

But today, I found hapiness in another Opinion writer. Bailey Singletary introduced me to a film called “Darius Goes West,” a film about a guy who has Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD) and travels from his home in Athens, GA on a cross-country trip to be on “Pimp My Ride.” There is going to be a screening here on campus at Lee Hall. From what I can tell Darius is going to be there, and he and his crew are going to take questions after showing the film.

The project is raising money for DMD research by selling DVDs for $20 each. Out of the twenty, $17 is for DMD research and the remaining $3 is used for making more DVDs. They are also taking donations as well.

It sounds like a great story and the film appears to be rather entertaining. I’ll know more next week. I know that some in the disability community do not like touchy-feely, sympathy-inducing stories about disabled people, espescially when used to raise money. But I don’t think this film is going to rub them the wrong way. I don’t think the focus of the film is going to be about how horrible his disability is, but rather about how life goes on and we make the best of it.

There has also been debate about cures. Some have said that they would not accept a cure because their disabilities help make up who they are. They don’t find cures to be the solution to the “problem.” It isn’t wrong to deny or accept a cure. Individuals have the right to make that decision for themselves. Personally, I would gladly accept a cure. Why? To be frank, my disability will kill me (all else equal). SMA is a progressive disease.

So I hope even the skeptical will give this film a chance, at least on the good chance that it will be entertaining. I’m planning on writing more about the film after the screening. Cheers.

The show will be much like The Office. In fact we’re pretty much copying the format to the letter. Our group is already kind of funny, so exaggerating our personalities and throwing in some fictional attributes will make for some hilarious scenes.

I’m still coming up with the characters. The show will be built on Jimmie (my student attendant). He’s going to be the “normal” character who’s not too silly or dramatic, but still has a personality (think Jim). I’m going to be a “disabled elitist” (my term I think) who calls people out on every potential degrading thing they could do or say. Even if what they say or do has to be construed. Matthew, a friend of mine who has low vision, is going to be our “blind friend” who constantly worries that he’s being excluded from our group because we use wheelchairs and he doesn’t. And when I say worry, I mean conspiracy theorist.

Shooting it is the next issue. Obviously, my standards aren’t high. I’m thinking a digital camera that does video would probably be good enough. I think we have one. I’ll check the library as well. What I’m worried about the most is people’s voices picking up. Anyone got some advice there?

We also need a name. I thought about The Square Table, but I think it should be something a little more descriptive.

Any ideas?

I was originally taking four classes this semester. Marketing Research is full semester and in-person. Finance 1 and Accounting are intensive, 8-week classes that take place first term (i.e. the first half of the semester). Management of IT and Systems is also an intensive, 8-week online class scheduled for second term. Like this:

Fall 2008 Class Schedule

I decided last semester that online classes would be better for me since I work well using a computer. Unfortunately, I didn’t consider the disadvantages of online classes. The first is that I retain most of the test material during lectures. I don’t retain a lot from reading, especially if I read through entire chapters. If I skim, I tend to miss everything. Well, online classes don’t have much lecturing. Accounting does have some useful video lectures, but Finance is lacking.

The second disadvantage is that exams are usually open-book and open-note. Obviously, distance learners cannot be proctored as well as their in-person counterparts. Most professors assume that students will use the book and or notes. To compensate, professors write more difficult questions. Open book tests are usually a disadvantage to me because it is difficult for me to flip through a book, much less at the same time I’m writing or typing. I hate textbooks. While it is possible to get digital copies, it can take weeks or even months of dealing with large, bureaucratic publishing companies. So I end up not using a book, but still having to answer tough questions.

Combined, these disadvantages (and the fact that some of the classes are intensive) left me taking a Finance midterm for which I was completely unprepared, without my book and notes, having to use a mouse, keyboard, and financial calculator at once. I nibbled on it, realizing I was getting nowhere, then turned it in mostly incomplete. I talked with my advisor today and dropped the class. The unfortunate result is that it is not offered in person next semester (my last). I will be forced to take it online again. But at least Accounting will be done. And now I know what to expect. I will plan out my tests with DSS so I can get some accommodations (writer and extended time).

As you can see, I’ve been busy. But some of the pressure is off now.

Ron Paul, his supporters, and like-minded individuals have gathered in Minneapolis today amidst the Republican National Convention to “rally” behind the idea of a free America. The Rally for the Republic has come at a crucial point in United States history. Many voters I know are students who are going to be voting for the first time. And they don’t know who to vote for. One candidate promises change, but proposes policies that furthers federal government control. The other candidate promises to not raise taxes, but plans to keep investing in an American empire all over the world, including a possible conflict with Iran.

Today, 10,000 people came together in Minneapolis to say “enough.” Those who could not be there, are with them in spirit… and watched the live video at Ron Paul’s Campaign For Liberty.

I was one of them.

As of only a few days ago, I knew not for which candidate I would vote. Today I am proud to say that my vote will not likely go to John McCain or Barack Obama. I have not yet decided whether I will vote for the Libertarian Party candidate or the Constitution Party candidate. Or who knows, I may write-in Ron Paul. But whoever it is will share my beliefs about the economy. I fear we are headed for a depression as bad or worse than the Great one.

Ron Paul has addressed problems with our economy (e.g. inflation). He has plans to cut federal spending by not letting the federal government overstep its boundaries, set forth in the Constitution. The government’s involvement in healthcare has helped to drive up medical costs while putting more red tape between doctors and their patients.

I’m tired of beurocracies. I’m tired of government waste.

I want an America that doesn’t rely on the government to fulfill all its wants and needs. Power should lie with the people.